How to Stay Positive During This Uncertain Time

This guide would help you develop positive thinking in every situation.

The Coronavirus pandemic has certainly been a source of stress for everyone. Many people are at home all day long with little to do. Talk of the virus can be heard almost everywhere. The talk about COVID-19 deaths instills fear. Many startups and other businesses are facing challenges to their survival. This can make it hard to stay positive.
The Coronavirus pandemic has certainly been a source of stress for everyone. Many people are at home all day long with little to do. Talk of the virus can be heard almost everywhere. The talk about COVID-19 deaths instills fear. Many startups and other businesses are facing challenges to their survival. This can make it hard to stay positive.

Staying happy and stress-free is essential to maintaining good health. How to stay positive is a big question for many people. Check below for some ways to stay stress-free and positive.

  • Limit your COVID-19 intake

Whenever you check your phone or television it seems, you see news related to Coronavirus. The more you read about this, the more disturbing it becomes. Limit your intake to this and utilise your time to do other things.

  • Understand your strengths

You are strong and you know this. You may feel hopeless many times during this pandemic but remind yourself of your strenght and resources. Tell yourself that you will get through this and you will become stronger from this.

  • Utilise your time wisely

You may have an abundance of time so try to use it effectively. Instead of scrolling social media apps and other platforms, use your time to learn something new and creative. If you have any new hobbies, explore them. Give time to yourself and be creative and productive.

  • Talk to a therapist or choose online counselling

If it’s hard to leave your house, it may suit you to talk to a therapist online. The Australian government is providing Psychology Medicare rebates and even bulk-billed psychology telehealth sessions during the COVID-19 crisis. You can get in touch with us for online therapy from anywhere in the world. We can partner with you to guide you through this tough time. Talk to us, share your problems with us and we will help you ease these concerns.

  • Get moving

Doing physical activity is great in increasing endorphins and reducing stress. Take a walk around your house, do skipping, jogging, yoga, exercise, etc. to keep your mental and physical health in good condition.

  • Reach out to people and talk to them

Even if you cannot physically go and meet your friends and relatives, hang out with them via phone or videoconference. You can still connect with them on the internet and through different social media platforms. Engage more with people and stay happy.

  • Make a plan

Chalk out a plan and follow it. Make a plan and include the activities that you want to do every day. A proper routine can keep you busy and focused. Include new things that you want to do in the plan and stick to your routine.

By doing this, you will hardly find any time to sit idle and stress yourself.

Follow these tips to stay happy and stress-free. These activities can prove a boost during this tough time. For further help, get in touch with us.

7 Things You Can Do to Start Your Day On a Positive Note

How do you start your day?

The dawning of every new day presents you with another fresh chance to make the most of unexplored potential and opportunities.

But how can you ensure that you start your day on a positive note, avoid anxiety and depression, and have positivity echoed throughout the day?

Below are seven habits that are guaranteed to help you start your mornings on the right footing and maintain the same until the day’s end.

1 – Keep A Reminder By Your Bedside

If you keep a note of what it is you intend to do or achieve in your day, and it becomes the first thing you wake up to every morning, then it can be the motivational element you need. You can write down your topmost priorities in life, and then read them and keep reminding yourself of those words so that you never assume or forget what is truly most important in life for you. Consider scribbling down at least three things that you give the highest priorities for the day. This process will help you work towards achieving those goals.

Additionally, you can scribble down anything that promotes a positive outlook on life. This will help you be more appreciative of things, be it the weather, work, food, people or different things that happen around you. It may not seem like much, but often it’s the small things that we take for granted that make the most significant impacts in our lives.

Get in the habit of allocating a few minutes to read what you have written down and to meditate upon it during the day.

2 – Give One Genuine Compliment

Give a genuine compliment to your spouse, friend, family member, workmate or merchant that you bump into in the morning. This will help lift their day and your day as a result. This may help you go about your activities feeling happier and with brighter spirits. Look at the various things that make you appreciate from the people in your life and then let them know how you value them.

If possible, let it come unexpectedly. Bonus points if it is something that person has not heard before. If you are short on ideas, pick something a bit different from the ordinary such as superficial stuff that people enjoy doing. For instance, you can praise someone for their great sense of fashion or taste in music, or how they are good with animals.

3 – Positive Nourishment During Breakfast

If you like to start the day with the news, just be mindful that you don’t start every day by reading about things things that are depressing and evoke negativity. Instead, settle for what will inspire you throughout the day.

You can opt to read check out websites and blogs that share funny, positive, and uplifting posts, such as https://psycoaching.com.au/blog/ As mentioned in point 1, you can have an inspirational book that you read a few pages of every morning to motivate you.

You can decide to start your day on a fun and warm note by engaging in exciting conversations when you are with the family at the kitchen table. And don’t skip breakfast – it really is the most important meal of the day!

4 – Start Work by Handling the Most Crucial Task of the Day

Always begin your work by handling the duties or responsibilities that you have given the highest priority. Completing such tasks will make you feel confident about your abilities, and happier when you take a rest during the day. It also will have you feeling confident when you move on to the pending jobs.

Psychologist Wendy Corlis suggests you avoid pushing yourself too hard to handle something if you are having trouble getting started. Take your mind off work for a few minutes, and then you can refocus on the task at hand with a fresh look at things. The hardest bit is getting started, but you need to find ways of remaining positive and ensuring things flow once you set the ball rolling.

5 – Take Things Slow

Avoid getting into things in a rush. Slow your pace so that you allow yourself to focus and be in tune with what you are doing. It will help you avoid stress when you encounter some challenges.

If you feel as though you are not getting much done at the end of your day, then ensure you handle some jobs that you find exciting and demand quality input from you. Such tasks can get your juices flowing and lower your stress levels, thus allowing you to proceed to the next duties feeling energetic. Start at a slow pace and see how it goes.

6 – Remember To Work Out

Healthy exercise is vital in starting your day with positivity. You should find ways to exercise through the course of the week says sports masseuse Jason Hollier, as it will help you lessen tensions, elevate your moods and enhance your energy levels. Your mind will feel more tuned in, and you may find you are more decisive and optimistic about what you want to achieve in each passing day.

If you can, squeeze in some workout sessions in your morning. Try walking to work, or riding a bike to school, or even a quick 15- minute workout before getting ready and taking your breakfast.

7 – Do The Right Thing (In A Small Or Big Way)

The objective of this is to boost your self-esteem and uplift your spirits so that you feel happier during the day. Strive to do what you feel deep within you is the right thing. For instance, you can opt to do the following:

  • Holding the door for your workmate, carrying some boxes for your neighbour, pointing out the way for that stranger you meet on the road or any other random act of kindness.
  • Be ready to offer a shoulder to lean on or a listening ear to someone in need of such.
  • Do something that inspires positivity in you or another person in one way or the other and building upon that step.

Do you need help finding balance and positivity in your life? Contact a Gold Coast psychologist to start e counselling and live the life you deserve.

By Finn Fox and Richard Moore.

www.psycoaching.com.au

New Years Resolutions Done Right

Happy New Year Everyone! Are you tired of New Years Resolutions? Do they cause you depression and anxiety?

What’s the big deal about New Years resolutions? After all – there is no time like the present to set and review goals. Well, it just happens to be January, so let’s take the opportunity to have a look at getting it right!

Many reading this may well say they are “done” with new years resolutions. The very nature of them means that we keep coming back to the ones that haven’t worked in the past – so we tend to set resolutions around our weaknesses, rather than capitalising on our strengths. As noble as it is to recognise our weaknesses and attempt to change them, we are facing an uphill battle if we don’t set a plan of action that focuses on capitalising on the strengths we already have. For those of us with a habit of “beating ourselves up” over resolutions that didn’t turn out as planned, this can weigh on us to the point where we may want to throw in the towel.

For some of us who did set new years resolutions; come February, we often find that the casual resolutions thrown about over Christmas drinks have either been forgotten, or are already starting to look too difficult.

So are New years resolutions worth doing?  Is there a better way of doing it to the way you are doing it now? Absolutely. You can also take the help of online therapy Australia to set your goals without getting stressed.

Give the following tips a try:

-Set goals using the S.M.A.R.T. approach (see previous posts).

– Avoid massive changes. Instead, plan to celebrate smaller wins toward small goals. The science says it’s far more likely to work for you. And you can always go back and set the next step in the next quarter.

– Do it gradually. You’re far more likely to have success if you do it in little chunks.
For instance, if you want to eliminate junk food from your diet, and total abstinence hasn’t worked in the past, remember that you don’t need to do it all at once. Instead, try not to have junk food for one meal a week, then every third meal, and so on. You’re more likely to have success if you do it in little chunks.

-Forgive yourself, because willpower will always ebb and flow. Use the moments when you’re feeling resolved to prepare for the times when you might falter.

-Set your life to minimise temptation. Put on your gym gear the night before, slice up fruit and veg and place it at the front of the fridge. Remember that if we order the super-size popcorn at the cinema, we will eat it.

-If necessary, make fewer resolutions in the first couple of weeks or months to allow yourself to really focus on what you want to accomplish.

And remember – if you have “fallen off the horse” already, don’t be too critical of yourself.  Setbacks are part of the process.  Just remember to get back on the horse.

If you would like some personal assistance with setting goals, or if something keeps on blocking you, personal consultation with a Gold Coast Psychologist can help.  

See the blog section at Psycoaching.com.au for more helpful articles.

What are your thoughts on new years resolutions?  Let us know in the comments below.

-Richard

Managing Your Emotions

Emotions can often be complex and confusing, yet our days are filled with an almost constant barrage of different feelings. Some such as happiness, excitement or contentment are positive and make us feel good. Others such as shame, anger or embarrassment are almost always much less positive and have a real effect on ourselves and our families if we cannot identify and manage them.

Identifying Emotions

Looking inwards, reflecting and being honest with yourself is important. Men in particular can struggle with this as emotions that lead to a feeling of perceived weakness might be hard to acknowledge. On the other hand, research shows that women can experience emotions more strongly. Some emotions are easy to identify, yet others can be difficult, the difference between envy and jealousy for example, or shame and embarrassment. It can be helpful to ask yourself “what am I feeling right now?”

Choose to Enact your Rational Mind

How you feel about a situation is largely beyond your control, but how you respond to it is. Imagine arriving at a crossroad, one path leads to an instant and perhaps negative reaction, the other to a much calmer more analytical approach. Consider asking “what does my rational mind think is the best course of action?”

Relaxation

Everyone needs an appropriate venue to vent their emotions, to feel understood and get things off their chest. Friends, an online psychologist (or your Gold Coast psychologist if you are in the area) are excellent resources to help you feel understood. E counselling can definitely help you to reduce the stress. Sometimes a different perspective can change how you feel, sometimes the simple act of talking is enough to relax you. A good psychologist can give you a number of strategies to calm down quickly that are tailoured to your specific needs.

Keeping a journal can also prove helpful to give your thoughts and feelings a safe place to exist outside your own mind. Online psychologists tend to agree that writing is therapeutic.

Practicing positive emotions, communication skills and meditative reflection won’t just help you to rehearse the reactions and emotions you want, it will also help you to relax. Not just in those moments but much more generally throughout your life, giving you much better emotional regulation and helping you to stay more relaxed and positive.

For further information on relaxation techniques and strategies for emotional regulation, click, tap or call me if you are in the Gold Coast area. You can also check out the online psychologist resources on my website at PSYCoaching.com.au

A closer look at Mindfulness

By Richard Moore – psychologist

Mindfulness has become something of a buzzword in recent years and has come to mean different things to different people. Those things are almost always positive, such as feelings of happiness, of awakening and living in the present, but how do we go about achieving them? What can practising mindfulness really do for us and our day to day lives?

Online psychologists all agree that mindfulness is much more than a buzzword, a marketing tool or trending topic on social media. It has the potential to become a different and much more beneficial way to live your daily life; it can be a perspective, one that will reap rewards.

How we define and think about mindfulness though, can vary. If you ask a Gold Coast psychologist for example then their definition may differ slightly from that of a person looking through a more spiritual lens. Each would have something important to say and each approach might have certain things in common and that is no coincidence.

Appreciation

Appreciation is an important factor in mindfulness, moving away from taking things for granted and more towards noticing and realising the value in the things we come across. It might be simple birdsong, or your child’s smile. It might even be the feel of your favourite item of clothing or the first cool evening of autumn. It could be one of a million things we don’t acknowledge because we are effectively on auto-pilot.

Mindfulness is all about switching off that automated way of thinking and purposefully accepting and hopefully enjoying the things we might normally miss.

Returning to the moment

‘Staying in the present moment’ is a phrase we hear a lot when looking at mindfulness, yet any online psychologist knows this is something of a misconception. Can we really do that given what our minds need to process and regulate the events of each day?

What we can achieve much more easily is returning our minds to the present, learning to self-regulate our attention with an ethos of curiosity, acceptance and openness to the things it holds.

That self-regulating, attentive definition can help a lot in understanding the broad nature of mindfulness. Taking ownership of your attention and regulating your focus, whatever that focus may be on at any given time. As well as engaging with, being curious about, and open to the things we might discover and learn as a result.

To learn more about mindfulness and the techniques and strategies for achieving a more mindful lifestyle, click, tap or call me if you are in the Gold Coast area. You can also check out the online psychologist resources on my website at PSYCoaching.com.au and arrange an online consultation.

How do you practice mindfulness? Let me know your thoughts in the comments section below.

gold coast psychologist

The Importance of Mindfulness

gold coast psychologistTake a minute and think of any three things that are bothering you at present.  Now ask yourself – how many of those things are actually problems occurring in the here and now?

In today’s fast paced life where we often feel like we are running out of time, we often have difficulty enjoying the present moment.  All too often we are either too busy anticipating what is to come or thinking about what has passed.  Spending excess time in the past – or future – keeps us “in our heads” and leads to states of anxiety and depression.

What is Mindfulness?

The term “Mindfulness” is a translation of the Pali term Sati which is an important element in Buddhist healing methods. As an intervention strategy many online and personal therapists use mindfulness to treat an array of mental health conditions.

How Does Mindfulness Help?

Mindfulness helps by:

  • Making us aware of the ‘self’
  • Helping us to feel our surroundings and make full use of our senses
  • Allowing us a break from the chatter of our minds, giving us a chance to calm down
  • Allowing us to appreciate the beauty around us
  • Practicing and refining our concentration.

Easy Mindfulness Exercises to Try

  1. Mindful breathing: Allow the breath to flow freely. Do not try to control it. Keep breathing and stretch your arms with every inhale and exhale.  Focus all your attention on your breath.  When your mind wanders, gently bring it back to your breath, without judgement.  
  2. Mindful observation: Select any natural object in your visual field (flowers, birds, the sky, water, a flame, a flower or even a picture) and allow yourself to become consumed by its presence.  Every time your mind gets distracted with thoughts, plans, or worries – just gently bring it back to observing the world around you.
  3. Mindful listening: This is simply selecting the music of your choice and listening to it on a low soothing volume. If it’s a song you’ve heard before, try to notice something new about it. Notice the intricacies and the complexities of the music.   When the music finishes, observe and name the next five sounds you can hear in the area around you over the next couple of minutes.
  4. Mindful eating: Take a break from the conversation and close your eyes.  Take a bite. Observe the nuances of the flavours.  Notice how it feels and tastes on different parts of your tongue. Roll it around on your tongue and observe the texture of the food.    

Mindfulness takes practice, but is well establish as an effective remedy for anxiety and depression.  Start with 5 minutes per day.

For further information, contact an online psychologist or Gold Coast Psychologist if you are in the area. Check out my website PSYCoaching.

If you have any queries or suggestions on this blog, please share in the comments below.

Strategies For Regulating Emotions

Emotional regulation is the ability to respond to emotions. It is one of the highest forms of self-control.

Stress in interpersonal relationships, things going wrong,conflicts within us and our own negative judgements can cause emotional dysregulation.

While some of us may be able to remain balanced in times of grief, some of us will break down emotionally and find our lives substantially disrupted.

Emotions are inevitable and we cannot ignore them. Rather, we must learn to think flexibly and express our emotions in a reasonable and effective way.

Types of Emotions

There are numerous different theories to describe emotions with different levels of depth. When trying to identify an emotion, we can start out by asking ourselves if we feel “mad, glad, bad, sad or scared.” A slightly more detailed conceptualisation is as follows:

Examples of Positive / Happy emotions

  • Joy
  • Surpise
  • Hope
  • Gratitude
  • Sympathy
  • Love

Negative emotions

  • Anger
  • Disgust
  • Pride
  • Fear
  • Sadness

Why Emotional Regulation is Important

  • Unregulated emotions can become intense and can have long-lasting effects on our lives and those of others if we act on them innapropriately.
  • Dysregulation of emotions affects not only our minds, but also causes stress on the body.
  • Emotional dysregulation consumes our mental energy in a way that takes our attention away from other important aspects of life (both professional and personal fronts).

It often seems difficult to regulate our emotions, which is why many people rely on online counselors and psychologists for help.

Some strategies for emotional regulation

Knowing how to regulate emotions involves becoming aware of how much we are letting the emotions affect us, then knowing how we can react to them. Here are few simple strategies of regulating emotions.

  • Write down your feelings – Maintain a diary where you can write down what you feel every day, even for small incidents.  Sometimes, once our feelings are penned down, the emotional burden loosens and we are able to look at them in more productive ways.
  • Communicate – Emotions often involve other people, especially the ones who are close to us. Never refrain from communicating with people and letting them know how you feel in a good way. Having a clear, meaningful conversation can be really helpful in regulating emotions.
  • Vent out – Learn and practice expressing emotions in the right way, at the right time and to the right person. For example, if you are angry at your boss, do not displace the emotion on your kids at home. Venting emotions at the wrong place and time exacerbates the problem.
  • Time out for emotions – Take some time out for yourself and do something that you love to do. Watch movies, hang out with friends, have your favorite ice cream, get a soothing massage.  Just enjoy your time out. Let the mind calm down and let the emotions flow in the right direction.
  • Accept and let go –  We have to accept that some circumstances are beyond our control. Forgive and forget. Holding on to something that cannot be changed brings more and more negative emotion that slowly creeps into our minds.

Remember that emotions are temporary, they come and go. Don’t let them stop you from where you wish to be. You can also talk to an expert, such as an online counselor or psychologist for proper guidance.

PSYCoaching  provides experienced, caring, and affordable support in the Gold Coast or online.

For any queries or feedback, please contact us at psycoaching.com.au.
Otherwise, leave your comments below.

Remember to take care of yourself.  You deserve it.
– Richard

 

New Years Resolutions: Stop hating them with these quick tips

The New Year can be a good opportunity to reset your goals.  But there is an art to getting them right.

Many reading this may well say they are “done” with new years resolutions – the very nature of them means that we keep coming back to the ones that haven’t worked in the past – so we tend to set resolutions around our weaknesses, rather than capitalising on our strengths. As noble as it is to recognise our weaknesses and attempt to change them, we are facing an uphill battle if we don’t set a plan of action that focuses on capitalising on the strengths we do have. For those of with a habit of “beating ourselves up” over resolutions that didn’t turn out as planned, this can weigh on us to the point where we may want to throw in the towel.

For some of us who did set new years resolutions; come February, the casual resolutions thrown about over Christmas drinks have either been forgotten, or are already starting to look too difficult.

So are New years resolutions worth doing?  Is there a better way of doing it to the way you are doing it now? Absolutely.

Give the following tips a try:

-Set goals using the S.M.A.R.T. approach (see previous posts).

– Avoid massive changes. Instead, celebrate smaller wins toward small goals. The science says it’s far more likely to work for you – and it’s definitely not too late to start.

– Do it gradually. You’re far more likely to have success if you do it in little chunks.
For instance, if you want to cut down on junk food, and total abstinence hasn’t worked in the past, remember that you don’t need to do it all at once. Instead, try not having junk food for one meal a week, then every third meal, and so on. You’re more likely to have success if you do it in little chunks.

-Forgive yourself, because willpower will always ebb and flow. Use the moments when you’re feeling resolved to prepare for the times when you might falter.

-Set your life to minimise temptation. Put on your gym gear the night before, slice up fruit and placing it at the front of the fridge. Remember that if we order the super-size popcorn at the cinema, we will eat it.

-If necessary, make fewer resolutions in the first couple of weeks to allow yourself to really focus on what you want to accomplish.

And remember – if you have “fallen off the horse” already, don’t be too critical of yourself.  Setbacks are part of the process.  Just remember to get back on the horse.

If you would like some personal assistance with setting goals, or if something keeps on blocking you, a personal consultation with a a qualified professional could help.   During  February 2016 Psycoaching is offering skype consultations at less than half the normal rate.

See Psycoaching.com.au

What are your thoughts on new years resolutions?  Let us know in the comments below.

-Richard

You are not alone

Mental illness is happening all around you, but you probably don’t see it.  Imagine, for a moment, a school prom – and you are standing around like a “wall flower;” feeling self-conscious.  Then look around and realize all the other wall flowers.  The irony in this situation is that there are many others in the room thinking “I really stand out here, and everyone is looking at me.”  Then consider this: how plausible it is that people will be worrying about how you look, when they are so busy worrying about themselves?

When you suffer depression or anxiety, (as we all do from time-to-time) it’s easy to feel like you are the only one going through such pain.  Isolation is normal when dealing with an overwhelming problem like depression or anxiety. But you are not alone.

DEPRESSION, TRAUMA, BULLYING – LAUGHING MATTERS: Celebrity Interview.

“Humour is infectious. The sound of roaring laughter is far more contagious than any cough, sniffle or sneeze. When laughter is shared, it binds people together and increases happiness and intimacy. Laughter also triggers healthy physical changes in the body. Humour and laughter strengthen your immune system, boost your energy, diminish pain, and protect you from damaging effects of stress. Best of all, this priceless medicine is Fun, Free and easy to use.” 

International award winning comedian of Warner Brothers Movie World / Police Academy Stuntshow fame Michael Bennett knows only too well about depression and despair.